How to Have Hard Conversations- EXTRA POINTERS
No one likes having difficult conversations. I know personally I hate being wrong, while at the same time thinking I'm a little more right than everyone else. That's not a good mix but I'm guessing I'm not the only one. I meet so many people deathly afraid to have difficult conversations. They think it's a war or hold back until they explode. They enter the conversation with clips full of ammo, and then wonder why the other person got hurt. It doesn't have to be this way! I shared two previous posts on the subject. There were a few extra pointers ...
The Weird Dreams We Have: David and the Angry Terrier
Weird Dreams: I have this weird dream I’d like to confess. I love dogs and after having to give away our dog a few years ago, I’d eventually love to own another. But, because of all the downsides of dog ownership, like actually having to care for the dog, I’m not pushing to purchase one anytime soon. But, I have this dream. I’m pulling in my driveway and a dog randomly walks up to me, kind of like God is specifically sending me a dog. I take it home and it turns out to be the best dog ever! It ...
What is Thorne Inc.?….from my weird family to yours: part 1
What is Thorne Inc.? I'm working on a Master's degree in Leadership and Management. As I consider the different ways to make use of all the things I'm learning, one ever-present source of application is my family. I noticed that over the years I've worked very hard applying leadership principles and skills to my work-related goals. But, so often, the people I love more than anyone else receive only my leadership leftovers. Two months ago I began asking the question, "What if I treated my family like a company and began applying all the best leadership principles I'm learning to them?" ...
4 Ways to Create Great Family Culture
Culture Matters There’s the old saying, “People don’t quit jobs, they quit managers.” They quit the environment managers create in their workplace. The most effective businesses in the world know that culture matters! Collins and Porras shared that companies built to last will have “cult-like cultures” (p. 114, 1994). They have a very clear idea of who they are and what it should be like to work in their environment. In their leadership research, Kouzes and Posner found that above all, people want to work for a leader they consider consistent and trustworthy (p. 37, 2012). Who wants to work ...
On Becoming a Parent worth Following: Leadership-Based Parenting
I had spent the entire day quietly studying leadership for my graduate classes, when at 3:45 my solitude was interrupted by my two young sons barreling through the front door. Upon entering, they threw off their hat and coats as if they were on fire, flung their shoes halfway across the room and immediately began grilling me with questions. “What’s for dinner?”, “Can I play with my friend?”, “Can I watch t.v?, “I’m hungry, can I have a snack?”, “No, seriously, what’s for dinner?”, “Can I play video games?” I took a few deep breaths and pleaded for them to ...
Attending Church for the First Time Can Be Scary
The First Day Remember your first day at the new school growing up- what it was like knowing no one? Remember being dropped off at camp, as you balanced trying to be cool saying good-bye to your parents, but terrified to see them leave? Remember your first practice with the new team, dance group, or club? It’s so easy to forget how scary it is to do something new. Once we feel a part of a community or group, it’s hard to remember what it was like to not feel that connection. Cognitive Psychologists coined the phrase, curse of knowledge ...
The Most Important Question a Leader Asks
I recently began a management and leadership degree and realized something very important about leading others. I’m working on two classes and both challenge me to grow by answering a critical question, possibly the most important question- Who am I? The better I understand myself as a leader (strengths, weaknesses, personality, leadership style), the better I’ll be able to lead. This idea was reinforced in The Leadership Challenge when the authors ask, “WHO ARE YOU? This is the first question your constituents want you to answer. Finding the answer is where every leadership journey begins” (Kouzes & Posner, 2012, p. ...
Dear Velocity…
Dear Velocity, I want to thank you for the honor and joy of serving with you over these last 7 years. It's hard to believe this Sunday will be my last as a staff member of Velocity. I remember the first time Scott sat in my living room sharing his vision for a new church. It would be a place broken people who felt far from God would feel loved and reconnect with their heavenly father. This church would not only change the way people thought about God, but also impact the city- because Jesus did not come to be served, but to serve. This dream became ...
Top 5 Posts of 2015
I had a blast blogging this past year and hope to blog even more in the coming year. I thought I'd share the top 5 most viewed posts from this previous year. 5. The Prayer that Changed My Life Forever I decided to share what I remember about saying goodbye to my dad in third grade. This was definitely an emotional post for me to write. I had a counseling appointment in grad school that changed how I viewed my dad's death forever and shared about it in this post. 4. Stuff My Kids Say #3 I began writing down ...
Stuff My Kids Say #3
I've continued collecting some of the things my kids say. Kids may drive us crazy sometimes, but there is no question they keep life interesting. For perspective: Caleb- Age 8 Logan- Age 5 Micah- Age 2 Dad- Hard to say Wife- Ageless 1.We want our kids to know they're smart, talented, good-looking and loved. So, at dinner one night I was joking around and said about Jess: David (to Jess): You're smart, talented, pretty, loved....and you have the best husband in the world. Caleb: You're not the best husband in the world. You are the 50th best husband. David: What? Who ...